Half Days, Two Days a Week
When we started looking at pre-schools eight months ago it seemed like September was, oh gawd, like, SO far away. But here it is. Right here. (Okay, well, it's technically still three weeks away, but that's soon.) And all these years that we haven't ever had a real babysitter or left you anywhere or gone to church are coming back to haunt me because I'm terribly worried.
Mostly because I'm afraid that you'll spend the whole day (and by "day" I mean the 2 1/2 hours you'll be at school) crying. The last time I tried to leave you somewhere, the church nursery, you cried the entire ten minutes I was gone, and then talked about it for the next six months about, "Hey mom, remember that time you left me at that PLACE and I CRIED and YOU DIDN'T EVER COME BACK?" For the record, I did so come back.
I know this is old hat for daycare moms. I know they went through this when their baby was three months old and they went back to work. But I kind of feel like this has been a 3 1/2 year maternity leave and now it's time to let you out in the big bad world.
And it's time. I know.
Also, I'm a little bit concerned that you'll tell people about how you need your soap to sleep because of your bad feet. Because, even for a pre-schooler? That's a little weird.
Mostly because I'm afraid that you'll spend the whole day (and by "day" I mean the 2 1/2 hours you'll be at school) crying. The last time I tried to leave you somewhere, the church nursery, you cried the entire ten minutes I was gone, and then talked about it for the next six months about, "Hey mom, remember that time you left me at that PLACE and I CRIED and YOU DIDN'T EVER COME BACK?" For the record, I did so come back.
I know this is old hat for daycare moms. I know they went through this when their baby was three months old and they went back to work. But I kind of feel like this has been a 3 1/2 year maternity leave and now it's time to let you out in the big bad world.
And it's time. I know.
Also, I'm a little bit concerned that you'll tell people about how you need your soap to sleep because of your bad feet. Because, even for a pre-schooler? That's a little weird.
3 Comments:
Feeling you but also laughing out loud about the soap.
I've been there. And this isn't just about her, this is part of your journey, too. Little bits of letting go but still being there no matter what. She's going to be great, even if you both have a bit of a transition. She with separation and you with...guilt, worry. And then guilt, worry. Oh, and helplessness. That's my favorite, the aching helplessness. But that's all part of this parenting gig and the trick is to find a way to live WITH it instead of fighting it. (I'm still workin' on that.)
I am in the process of lining up a babysitter for the boy-child for the first month so I can spend every day stalking the pre-school.
She might surprise you... my daughter started preschool last year, 4 hours twice a week. I was certain she would *freak out*. She was never in daycare, and never even had a babysitter that wasn't a family member... First day of school, she was like, 'Bye mom!' and that was it. The school allows parents to stay in the class for an extra 15 minutes during the first week, and I was the only parent who dropped their kid off and left...that made me feel kinda weird LOL.
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